March 2021

Dear Blessed One,

Over the years, the most commonly asked question of me is, "What happens after awakening?"

I'll never forget something one of my teachers said to me during a private retreat with him in early 2008. After much conversation, I had many questions like, "What will I lose? What changes when one awakens? Will I still feel like me?"

He laughed and replied (I'm paraphrasing), 'basically, if one is an asshole before awakening, they'll still be an asshole after awakening.' I don't think he was referring to me. 😊

When identification with the false sense of self dissolves, we see things in a new way. Rather than being trapped in the tiny mind-created version of self, there is an expanded sense of self that is no longer fighting with what arises in Consciousness. Freed from the pressure to fix oneself or attempt to fit into a conditioned mind-structure of self, consciousness expands more and more.

The basic personality remains; however, it becomes quite impossible to hide from oneself. Shadow aspects, wounds and human messiness are seen with clarity and without judgment. In resting with whatever is arising in the moment, it shifts, not because one needs it to or even wants it to but because one is no longer fighting with what is arising in Consciousness. With expanded awareness and a sense of self love, new choices can be made from the stillness of one's inner-being rather than from the limited and conditioned human perspective.

Once awakened, there is a maturing process that happens, which can take some time. After realizing one's true nature -- Beingness -- it can feel a bit wobbly out in the world. For me, nothing fit in all the old boxes (I couldn't even find the boxes!). Many of the rules of how to be in relation with people, work, and society were stripped away. The longing for activities that once brought me pleasure or material things I used to desire (which fed the false self) rapidly vanished. Much like a toddler and then adolescent, I learned to move in a way that felt authentic to my inner essence instead of following the shoulds that had been programmed into the past version of me.

Slow the busyness of your life. Take moments to tune into the inner world. Break up routines in order to have more awareness of your being in the moment. Be here now, as awake and aware as you can. Presence is key in the awakening process.

Without any set routine, alternate and give yourself...
- five minutes of deep conscious breathing
- five minutes of watching thoughts drift in and out
- five minutes of gazing into your eyes in the mirror
- five minutes with bare feet on the ground feeling earth energy
- five minutes in nature looking at a tree, a flower, birds or clouds

After the awakening, chop wood and carry water, it's just done without a story that says it should be or needs to be different.

Much Love and Blessings to You!
shellee rae

"There is no practice you can undertake to discover what you already are. Life is not waiting for you to awaken or to transform." ~ Matt Licata