August 2021

Dear Blessed One,

There were many times in the awakening process that I screamed out to life, "I've changed my mind; I don't want to wake up!" I often had flash thoughts of Cypher in the movie, The Matrix, when he wanted to get plugged back into the matrix because he had decided that ignorance actually is bliss.

Awakening from the mind-created self is not easy nor is it fun. As we shake the foundation of the illusory self with awareness, it can feel like we are dying. The mind can create feelings of fear, panic, terror, anger, or it can collapse into depression.

As you shed beliefs, programming, and conditioned world ideas, it may seem like you are going crazy. You are actually going sane and are on the road to your authentic self. It can be a WILD ride.

When our house is in darkness, we cannot see the clutter and the dusty messes that lurk in the corners of the rooms. Once the light of consciousness is turned on, we now can not NOT see it. Nope, you cannot get plugged back into the matrix. And so, the only thing left to do is to begin cleaning house.

As an old wound surfaces, be with it. All it wants is attention and full expression. If it's a two-year old version, it may need to have some good ole healthy "terrible-twos" temper tantrums. Prepare ahead of time with a friend or loved one so they can hold space for you during the healing eruptions.

Our bodies are remarkable. They can swallow emotions, dodge feelings, compartmentalize, and store things away for many, many years! As we awaken, old frozen fragments are no longer in resonance with our new frequency and so the rumbling begins.

We are not our wounds, nor our history. We are not our professions, nor our degrees. We are none of our labels; mother, father, sister, brother, friend...

Ask yourself the question, "Who am I?" Is there a voice that wants to answer? If so, there is still identification with the mind-created self. The mind states titles, accomplishments, history, dreams of the future, etc. Even if the mind answers, "I am a spiritual being," or "I am a divine and eternal being," this still is not your true essence.

When attention is rooted in the essence of being, stillness, no words will rise to define it. Who you are is experiential. It goes beyond the limiting labels of the mind. Of course, the mind wants to define it almost immediately when one touches the essence of being. It is beautiful, so vast, eternal, and so on. Yes, the essence that animates form is those things and so much more. However, when experiencing essence, there is no mind telling a story about it. Essence has no desire to define itself.

Mind chatter is the very thing that interferes with the stream of consciousness that silently waits for attention. Be still, breathe, and bring awareness to whatever is arising in the body. Allow it to percolate; give it plenty of space, time and attention. It may need more than one visit.

It can be helpful to remember while in the throes of mental, physical, or emotional upheaval, that life is pushing us to awaken, and life is getting rather adamant about it. What this beautiful planet needs the most is our awakened hearts and awareness deeply rooted in the essence of being.

Much Love and Blessings to You!
shellee rae

"For a seed to achieve its greatest expression, it must come completely undone. The shell cracks, its insides come out and everything changes. To someone who doesn't understand growth, it would look like complete destruction." ~ Cynthia Occelli.